In our new 'politically correct' world you may have caught wind of the notion that 'gender is a social construct.' For the 0.6% of the human population that suffers from gender identity issues this may feel like it is true, but fortunately we have science to help the majority of us understand that male and female differences are real and hard wired into the human genome. Join me on a 20 minute visit to the real world of gender differences in how men and women react to each other and why brain differences exist to ensure our species survival and propagation, as well as some insight into how our modern invention of the fantasy of "One True Love" can get in the way of our meeting great life partners.
Link to original blog post:
Just One Cynic's Opinion is a series of insights into human nature by a veteran of the international ad agency business and a perpetual student of human nature. Having worked in Europe, the Middle East, Canada, the US and Mexico and traveled to many corners of the globe since my teens I bring a diverse perspective to the challenge of understanding why we do the often counterproductive things we do.
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HERE'S THE INTRO TO MY ORIGINAL BLOGPOST:
First the bad news: There is no "The One".
Now the good news: YOU are "The One"...
"Marriage is not about finding the right person. It's about becoming the right person. Many people feel they married the wrong person, but... it's truly about growing to become a better spouse."
Psychology Today, January 2012, "Are You with the Right Mate?
Ladies, I get a lot of flack, especially from the more mature women out there, for being attracted to women younger than myself who look after themselves well (i.e. are 'trim'). I try to explain that men's "visual preferences" regarding what attracts them to a potential mate does not age, evolve, develop or mature as their bodies and brains do; it is natural human hard-wiring (automatic responses) for men to continue to be attracted to women who are in their fertile years (and human ova reach maximum fertility at age 18 and drop off dramatically after 28), but the rain of derision and cynical critiques continue!
Now this from Dr. Louann Brizendine, author of "The Female Brain" and "The Male Brain", clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco, from an article on CNN.com (click for link). Maybe some of you single (and married!) women can turn this info to your advantage...
The Bottom Line
The human brain is the best learning machine on the planet and human beings are capable of making major changes in our lives. But there are some things that the male brain and female brain are not likely to change anytime soon. And it makes more sense to deal with these brain realities, than to argue with them or ignore them.
The best advice I have for women is make peace with the male brain. Let men be men.
We're the Same, But Very Different!
Although women the world over have been doing it for centuries, we can't really blame a guy for being a guy. And this is especially true now that we know that the male and female brains have some profound differences.
Our brains are mostly alike. We are the same species, after all. But the differences can sometimes make it seem like we are worlds apart.
The "defend your turf" area -- dorsal premammillary nucleus -- is larger in the male brain and contains special circuits to detect territorial challenges by other males. And his amygdala, the alarm system for threats, fear and danger is also larger in men. These brain differences make men more alert than women to potential turf threats....
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