Do you notice the little nervous anxiety, or even the despair or over-excitement (depending on your mood) when you're about to gather with others in a major feast? Or perhaps it's AFTER the feast or social gathering is over.
Or both.
There's a sense of lack of safety in the air. I can't trust others, I certainly can't trust myself. We must be cautious, careful, vigilant, or we must give up.
One thing that alters our experience of food, eating, and having a body as dangerous, as unsafe, is to begin to explore the feeling of safety. Safety in our bodies. Safety in the room, at the gathering, with other people. What would feeling safe be like? What if we found examples of safety in our daily experience of eating, of foods, of celebrations and feasts, rather than danger and hardship?
Who would you be with a different story? A safer one?
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